Welcome back to the NEGOTIATEx podcast! You’ve probably heard the term “IQ,” but do you know your EQ? The NEGOTIATEx team’s focus today is emotional intelligence.

The EQ: Measuring Psychosocial Sentience

Many people know their intelligence quotient (IQ). This is a measurement of someone’s intellectual capacity.

Similarly, you have an EQ, too. It’s a measurement of your emotional intelligence quotient. Studies suggest that your IQ has little to do with it, though.

You don’t need Einstein’s brain to be emotionally intelligent. However, your EQ is an important factor in successful leadership: Emotionally intelligent leaders spark engagement in those around them.

At the same time, emotional intelligence is also crucial to success in negotiations. For example, Empathy; the ability to sympathize to the point of feeling what others do, is a hallmark of high EQs.

Likewise, empathy can enable the establishment of a deeper-than-usual rapport with other parties. This depth of understanding can be impossible to reach without it.

The 5 Facets of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence has 5 commonly recognized elements: Self-awareness, Self-regulation, Motivation, Empathy, and Social Skill.

Self-awareness is pretty much what the name implies: It’s your ability to recognize your own emotions. Additionally, it’s also how well you perceive their effect on your thoughts and behavior.

Meanwhile, Self-regulation is your ability to manage your emotions in a healthy way. This includes controlling impulsive feelings and behaviors, taking initiative, adapting to changing circumstances, and keeping commitments.

Your Motivation is the degree of passion you have for working beyond external rewards like money or status. Healthy indicators include curiosity in learning, an inner sense of what’s important in life, and a strong drive to achieve.

Empathy, specifically as an element of EQ, is your social awareness. It involves understanding others’ emotions, needs, and concerns. However, it also includes your ability to recognize power dynamics within an organization or group and the degree to which you feel comfortable socially.

Last but not least, Social Skill is the ability to communicate clearly, maintain and develop good relationships, and influence others. Your ability to work well in a team, inspire others, and manage conflict factor in, too.

Encouraging Higher EQs

Some leaders dream of raising a subordinate’s IQ. That may be a pipe dream, but raising their EQ may actually be doable.

Start by discussing the 5 elements of emotional intelligence. Next, respectfully ask about people’s formative experiences, as well.

These aren’t one-and-done solutions. In fact, they’re only the beginning of the process, but if you work to meet people where they currently are emotionally, it’s a start.

Key Takeaways

• Read more about emotional intelligence. Adele Lynn and Daniel Goleman have each written pivotal works on the subject. If this approach to negotiation is new to you, reading up is a great way to get the ball rolling.

• Your EQ will affect your results at the negotiation table. For instance, empathy helps you to not just understand your counterparts—but to see things from their side. This raises your chances of establishing a rapport.

• Don’t get discouraged! Unlike someone’s IQ, the human EQ is trainable. So there’s no need to feel intimidated. Once you’re aware that you’d like to improve yours, you’ve taken the first step.

• Take tactical pauses. If someone says something you don’t like, don’t rush to anger. It’s always better to pull over, listen—to see if you even heard what you think you heard—and take stock.

Aram and Nolan go deeper into emotional intelligence and its benefit in negotiation in today’s NEGOTIATEx podcast. Questions and episode suggestions to team@negotiatex.com are always welcome. Don’t forget to drop by negotiatex.com for more information and our negotiation prep tool, either.

Your time’s important to us. Thanks for listening!